1 month!

 So Cecelia Grace Robson is ALREADY 1 month old. She is doing fabulous and is such a good baby. I have loved having a month to get to know her and spend so much time with her.

• She has gained TONS of weight since she came home. for a breastfed baby to be gaining this much weight is unusual but definitely a good sign. She eats great!
• She is in 0-3 month clothes! 
• She is awake a lot more these days. a couple hours every morning and afternoon and before bed!
• She is sleeping in her own crib in her own room!
• She wakes up once every night. Originally it was at 1am, but lately she has been sleeping for 6 hour stretched instead of 4 (yay) and it has been between 2 and 4am everyday. which is awesome! 
• She follows things with her eyes and head VERY well. 
• She responds to my voice, touch, smell and sight as well as Kel's. I am pretty sure she is also familiar with my mom's voice and smell as she reacts to her similarly as she reacts to me. 
• She can pus herself up with ehr legs and feet when she is on her stomach.
• She holds her head up both when being held and during tummy time. 
• She LOVES to be held and is super cuddly
•  BUT she also entertains herself very well when put down on the floor.
• She does great with all her older cousins poking and holding her!
• Her favorite thing to look at is a mirror. it immediately calms her down when she is upset. 
• She doesn't cry unless there is a reason 
• The doctor said it's unusual to have a first baby this calm and sleep trained and behaved, but to consider ourselves very lucky!

 Obviously we love her. life with her is great and we couldn't imagine anything different. I am excited to go back to work but really wish i didn't have to leave her (most days anyway). She grows everyday and if people go a week without seeing her she is completely different when they do see her. She lets us dress her up and put on frills, etc with no complaints! I love her and am ready to see how she grows but also wishing she could stay put for awhile and she is growing way to fast (cliche but true). She was more than worth 9 month of a difficult pregnancy and all the sickness!

This outfit is a shout out to Aunt Beth (can't wait for you to meet her) and Aunt Karen who have birthdays this week!

Her story

So, here are the wonderful details of how the most BEAUTIFUL little girl i have ever seen (sorry rest of the world) came to take her first breath. I am not gonna lie if someone had told me this birth story while i was pregnant i would have cried. It was not fun or pretty, but it was worth it the moment i held my little girl.

Thursday the 9th i had a doctor's check-up and we were going to pick the date for my induction. originally the doctor had said it would be Friday, but she was not on call this weekend and knew it was not going to be an easy ride so we opted to come in again Monday and figure things out. Frustrated the weekend passed and nothing happened so we went in Monday expecting ti be induced that night. well the doctor was ready for me to be induced, but the next appointment was not until Tuesday night. So i went home, in tears, and moped for about 24 hours. We had at appointment for Tuesday at 10pm. All day Tuesday Kel and i went out and took some pictures to mark what i looked like the day before baby was born. I was HUGE, but the pictures turned out cute. 

So after dinner with my parents and a but more waiting we went in. Within an hour they got me hooked up and ready to go, with the Petosin (sp) started.It was slow going at first, but there was no real pain so they were able to up the amounts pretty quickly throughout the night. Problems started at about 1am when my blood pressure got REALLY high. I had to lay on my side wand wasn't allowed to move. Well as i turned to my side baby shifted and the heart monitor they had on her couldn't find her even after the nurse dug around. the told em to get some sleep and tried to find her heartbeat, eventually they did and i got about 1 hour of sleep... woohoo. at 4am my mom came and let kel get some sleep, since by then they had me flipping sides every hour. At 6am the lost baby's heartbeat for over 45 minutes 9scariest 45 minutes of my life) and it was determined that when the doctor made rounds at 7am they had to break my water and put in an internal monitor for contractions and her heartbeat. Since i was on the Petocin it's mandatory to record those, and with my blood pressure through the roof and baby nowhere to be found and my contractions coming in very strong and steady we were in a big pickle. Oh and the final catch, nobody could find y cervix because it was located in an odd place, so there was no way to determine if i was progressing. However i was handling everything very well, in good enough spirits and the pain was no issue at all.

So the doc came in at 7am, broke my water, determined i was no more than a three, still possibly a 2 (10 in the ultimate goal) had a LONG way to go but this should help. We had all the internal monitors put in and baby was good and contractions were much stronger than everyone thought since i was only a 2 or 3. after another hour i was still not progressed but the contractions were close to together. for a few more hours things were really picking up, but again i had not progressed any. with contractions 2 minutes apart and lasting almost a minute with no progress i was starting to panic.I was passing out between contractions and unable to handle them, plus i had to lay on my right side in order to keep my hip in socket. I was given small dosing of pain med, but they were reluctant to give me more because they were gradually dropping baby's heart rate. So i started asking about the options we had for pain management or other. the words c-section cam up and i knew that would be the safest route for all of us. Kel and i talked so briefly, but he could see that this was the safest route and recovery time would not be a factor if baby didn't come out safe. So at 11:00 we opted for a c-section and by 12:00 (noon) they were wheeling me in. Ounce they got started i realized the midsection of my epidural was not as strong as it should be and i c9ould feel them beginning to cut into my abdomen. I not so politely screamed at the doctors that i could feel it all. the only immediate way (as i was open, bleeding, prone to infection) to sedate me was morphine, so they pull out a HUGE vial of morphine and off i go. I remember nothing about the c-section (at one point i told kel Harry Potter was NOT the father of my child, i cussed out all the doctors while joking with them, and proceeded to exclaim i had fallen down the rabbits hole and into knock turn alley- that's right baby girl this is how mommy brought you into the world) and have no clue other than the picture of the first time i met my daughter. however she was safe and beautiful and PERFECT. they did have trouble getting her out, they had to widen my incision beyond normal lengths and forceps were used not once, but TWICE to get my c-section baby out. She just didn't want to come out. The doctor a day later told me had i tried to push it could have been really dangerous and bad seeing how reluctant she was to come out and that i would have had an emergency c-section anyway. The timing i had in making that decision saved a lot of trauma, pain, and possible problems and tearing for both me and her.

 perfect from the start!

 

first family photo- i have NO memory of this but the picture's so sweet to have

Cecelia Grace Robson came into my life, this world and our little family on the Assumption of Our Lady (coolest Holy Day) Aug. 15th at 12:36pm weighing 7lbs 12 ounces and measuring 20 1/2 inches.

Cuddles with mamma!

 SUCH a cutie!

 Going HOME!

Too cute not to Love!

First bath- not her favorite, but she likes them now!

One of my favorite outfits, her butt has a giant cupcake and ruffles on it! 

Daddy wearing her in the moby wrap- his new favorite way to do chores! 

Since then she has blossomed. The doctor has told us every time she has seen Cecelia that she is amazing, and one of the most perfect babies ever. She was holding her own head up day one (not kidding either) and she eats amazing. i was worried about breastfeeding but this kid has led the way and does great. I was released from the hospital a day and a half earlier than most c-sections. She has officially gained back all the weight she had lost in the hospital. Also i have started pumping (i feed her 8-12 times a day and pump 2 times a day) about 10-15 ounces a day (which seems normal to me, but i have been told from others that 10-15 ounces for the first WEEK of baby's life in UNHEARD OF- but we need the supply for when i go back to work). She i wonderful and one of the most beautiful babies i have ever seen- yes i am biased! She only cries when she is hungry and is So well behaved. sleep good at night and on a schedule during the day already! Motherhood is SO MUCH EASIER than being pregnant and we are so blessed with our little family.

weird to think...

that i can honestly say i am going to have a baby this week! Yup that's right if i haven't had her by Friday i will be induced this week.

It was a long conversation i had with my hubby, but after finding out how big baby is and the last visit where the doc said i am very close to my cervix being "ready" we decided to go ahead and let them induce me at 39 weeks. There's a lot of controversy about inducing before 40 weeks or even 41 weeks, but each case is individual. Literally right now baby is so big that if we wait until 40 or 41 weeks there's a chance i wont be induced as much as a planned c-section. I definitely don't want a planned c-section s(if it happens no problem that's what is best for baby, but i want to TRY natural first before we decide on surgery). So instead we are opting that teh first possible moment it is legal to induce (at 39 weeks) i will be heading in to get this going! woo hoo! of course baby girls ALWAYS has the option of just coming early by herself and i am MORE than encouraging of that behavior.

The biggest thing lately is that everyone i talk to tell me if we need anything just ask! I always feel weird when people off this because i am not sure who i can ask and what i can ask without overstepping my boundaries. Kel and I already do need help in numerous ways and i know for a fact we will be needing help after baby in even more ways. I hate asking for help, so maybe this way if people want to help they can look here ans see what we need and if it's plausible to help. the top ones are:

• food! we are stocking up on freezer meals! honestly cooking is a struggle for both of us, shopping is even worse and we have been trying to freeze everything so that after baby we don't have to dwell on what we will eat. So far we have enough food for 1-2 weeks if we are careful! this is nothing and as i will be home and not at work eating this kinda worries me! we aren't very picky and will not turn down food if someone ever offer to bring us a meal (either now for the freezer or after baby is here for dinner!)
• diapers! we are doing cloth diapers and we only have 6 with minimal of the needed "accessories." On average you need 18-20 for one kid if you plan on doing laundry every day. The ones we registered for are $20 a diaper and it's all adding up. we have been setting aside money to get them, then today kel's car blew a flat tire and we spent our diaper money on his tire! So we are officially having issue figuring out what to do for diapers. The nice things is once we have them we don't need anymore, EVER and my sister is letting us use all her newborn diapers for right after baby. Big issue though is if baby is as big as they say, she will only fit in newborn diapers for 2 weeks and then we are back to square one with the no diapers thing! It's so easy to order online (if you wanna help out form a distance) and then Kel and I (or a willing helper) can just go and pick them up from the store! Our registry is still up at the website all needed information is here: 
• Event name: Cecelia Grace Robson
•  walks- haha RIGHT NOW i need someone to go on walks with me until she gets here. I am trying to take a long walk (by long i mean VERY VERY slow as i waddle pretty badly, but not very far in distance, just down the trail 1/4 of a mile-ish) everyday but Kel works ALL week overnights and i am too paranoid to walk by myself. I feel bad asking people but if someone where to arrange a date and time i know it'd be easier for me to get moving! And honestly a couple weeks after baby when i am ready to get moving and have nowhere to go i am sure i will need more walking buddies.
• lots of prayers! 

Pretty much right now it's all jitters! Kel has to work all week and then we can only afford for him to take a minimal amount of time off after baby comes. I am super nervous about when baby is home and it's just me alone, but at the same time i am SO miserable right now i feel like i am going to bust if i have to wait any longer! i feel a little worse every day and i can't imagine what i will feel like by the end of the week!

Ready, Set, wait around for awhile more!

I am officially 37 weeks, which means i am full term and if i were to go into labor they would be ready to deliver and not try to stop anything. This week has been a crazy week for baby and i know a lot of people want updates so here is what happened:

Thursday (8am) i had a doctor's appointment. I was "checked" (for dilation, in simple terms for my friends who don't know pregnancy jargon i need to be 100% effaced and 10cm dilated for a healthy delivery) and the doc said i am more than 50% effaced but only 1 cm dilated. She also said she thought baby might be breach (butt down) so she wanted a sono. She was SHOCKED that i wasn't more dilated and very honestly said that it would be better for me to go earlier, healthier for baby considering how sick i have been and she's hoping it happens in the next week.

** side note for the next week the doctor i really DO NOT want to deliver Cecelia is on vacation, so the timing would be PERFECT if she came sooner because i wouldn't have to worry about who is on call!

After we saw the doc we had our sono and baby is BIG especially considering i technically have 3 more weeks expected to go. She was measuring with a large head, big belly and TALL a 7lbs 13 ounces! Now i know that the measurement can be off, but how i have been feeling the weight lately 8lbs sounds about right. the best part is she is head down and READY to go.

We officially got the say that any day now and it's GOOD news (not scary becuase she's early news). Her lungs look good, her face is down and she's riding low. My belly has officially "dropped" so it'll be no more than two weeks of waddling.

Later that day I came home form work and kel and i did a ton of freezer cooking. as we were finishing i had a random gush of fluid. We THOUGHT it could be my water breaking, but i had had NO contractions and wasn't dilated at all 8 hours before. we called and the hospital told us to come in and get it checked. After one hour it turns out my water had not broken, baby had moved and her large head hit my bladder and i lost my bladder (most embarrassing thing ever!). Apparently this late in the game that happens to MOST women at least once. The weird part was that i was having contractions (the machine measures them) and they were steady and only 2 minutes apart, but i was not dilating AT ALL or feeling the contractions, i only felt a couple and they did not hurt at all.However i am fully effaced but not at all dilated and i need BOTH! Luckily my doctor was on call and she said i should go home, get comfy and wait it out. Since i know i have a high pain tolerance she said to be careful, i might not feel how serious things get. So after getting all worked up and calling in at work kel and  i went home no baby and no signs of WHEN baby was coming.

When we got home we took a LONG walk to my sister's house and took the LONG way back, went to BWW and i ate SUPER spicy wings (Which i NEVER do), saw a rainbow and took another small walk.   Kel went to play poker and two good friends came over and cleaned my house for me (I am SO SO SO grateful for them because my house was a disaster and i had no energy to even TRY to clean any part of it. Thanks to them everything is done including laundry and putting away all baby's fresh clean clothes.) and i relaxed.i definately was having contractions, but they weren't consistent. So i went to bed.

No more contractions.... i apparently slept it off... who does that????

So i woke up feeling fine, no baby today, went to work and have spent the WHOLE afternoon walking AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE!

I am super frustrated! i'm ok with waiting another week or two for baby, i was told they will induce me in 2 weeks if i haven't gone because ti will be too risky for me to go later than that, and i'm ok with that. i am also ok with baby coming this weekend as i am EXHAUSTED! either way i really need baby to make up her mind. she is ready, i am set.... when do we go? Either way we need to get an informed decision from this baby.

nesting and swelling and nausea OH MY!

I have been waiting my whole pregnancy to finally hit that nesting stage i heard so much about. Way back when i had just announced i was pregnant a lady i used to baby sit for gave me ALL her old girls' 3-12 month clothes. She had her first daughter in august and said she's been waiting to pass them on to someone who has an august baby, so they are for the correct season/warmth etc. They have been sitting in a bin, unfolded and unsorted for six months. Today i finally took them all out, sorted them and put them away. i have all the 3-6 month clothes in 1/2 my old dresser (organized by onesie, pants, outfit and then the cute little dresses and sweaters are hung up) and the rest is organized by size and put back into storage, in the closet not baby's floor! all the newborn stuff is out and in a pile (we don't have a hamper or basket yet but hopefully will get one soon) to be washed and put away. I still need pretty much everything for baby (changing station, crib, sheets, diapers, wipes, bags, etc) but i know where it will all go so when we get it it's easy to put away! Also we finally got decor on the walls of the nursery (just one wall) and it's SO cute.Once we get the nursery finished i PROMISE i will post pictures!

How far along?: 34 weeks

 How big is baby?: according to the doctor right on track.

Stretch marks?:yes but if anyone is seeing my stomach at this point it's because they are my husband or doctor and neither of them care.

 Sleep?: not bad, i am sick of peeing all night every night

 

Food cravings? nothing, i am back to being sick. literally every time i eat something within 5 minutes i am throwing it all back up. i don't feel nausea or anything, in fact i feel like i am always super hungry but every time i eat i have to excuse myself, get sick, then i can finish my meal in peace. Sorry if that's TMI but it's the weirdest thing. after I'm sick i am able to eat small portions. this has happened every meal for 4 days now. It's easier than when i was sick before, but i wish i knew what caused it. I know it's not WHAT i eat because i have made sure to eat such a variety to rule out anything specific so i can cut it form my diet. I think i will just blame the heat. I've been SO hot ALL the time with this weather that it seems like a good thing to blame.

 

Movement?: not as much lately. i know she is getting a bit cramped in there

Gender?: GIRL!

Belly button?: very stretched out, but still an innie! Kel and i had a bet, he bet my belly button would be an outie by now- i totally won! i bet i never have an outie

What are you looking forward to this week? well i REALLY want to start packing our hospital bag, but i am making myself wait at least 2 more weeks. That plus i have NO nursing bras or tank tops or ANYTHING. we take a class next week on breastfeeding, etc so i want to wait until after that class to buy any of that. plus i have BABY SHOWERS (so pumped) and Kel and I aren't buying anything until after those. But we are both getting overtime on our next paydays so i am hoping to set money aside for diapers (check out www.pinstipesandpolkadots.com to see what kind of cloth diapers we registered for) and other baby needs.


Random question: did anyone else who had a late summer baby ever get swollen hands/feet/legs/everything! yesterday i was outside for the shortest time ever (5 minutes) and afterwards my hands and legs were SO swollen i couldn't make a fist or walk. i immediately laid down, drank a ton of water and Gatorade and iced them. It hurts so much when my feet swell and i was wondering if anyone else had to deal with extreme swelling and HOW you dealt with it.

the wait is on!

How far along?: 33 weeks

 How big is baby?: according to the doctor right on track.

Stretch marks?:yes but if anyone is seeing my stomach at this point it's because they are my husband or doctor and neither of them care.

 Sleep?: good! when i actually sleep it's GREAT but my sleep habits are a bit off with work. 

 

Food cravings? nothing too extreme. this morning Kel asked what i wanted for breakfast and i said "toast and ice cream." the best part is he brought me toast AND ice cream!

 

Movement?: ALWAYS! she is always moving and it's EXHAUSTING. not to mention when she's more active it's more painful!

Gender?: GIRL!

Belly button?: very stretched out, but still an innie!

What are you looking forward to this week? honestly just being one week closer. last Friday i was in the hospital having a couple of contractions with some bleeding and back pain. It turns out i had a bladder infections that could possibly have been working it's way to my kidneys (hence the back pain). they gave me meds and said i need to keep my feet up as much as possible. Well this week at work things went CRAZY and i ended up working crazy hours (including an overnight) and it was opposite of what i should have been doing. plus the massive heat wave meant my feet swelled to enormous proportions (the doctor literally was shocked that my FLIP FLOP was still on). So i had a check up yesterday and although i still have a bladder infection it's nothing to worry about. the biggest thing my doctor said is it's still to early to be comfortable with delivery and she's on vacation for the next 2 weeks so i need to be really careful (i actually will be this time). No being outside in the heat AT ALL and nothing intense, she said preferably don't celebrate the 4th just eat food with your feet up. She then said she would be SHOCKED if i didn't deliver early i just need to hold on for 4 more weeks until i am full term!

It's scary to hear a doctor say that baby is already moving into a delivery position and with the heat and my active lifestyle plus all the complications i have already had that baby just needs to wait a few more weeks. As ready as i am to not be pregnant and hold my baby girl i know i need more time and baby ESPECIALLY needs more time. Luckily with everything going on bed rest wouldn't really do much or prevent much so i just need to relax more than i do. This means when i am not working i do no housework and poor kel has to pick up all the slack. i don't think he minds but it bothers me that he does ALL the cleaning and cooking and laundry, etc.

however we added a little bit more accessories to the nursery and all we need are a few more things (the big one's a crib) and it will look ready for a baby!

Unable to Beat the Heat

How far along?: 32 weeks

 How big is baby?: big! and i feel a little heavier every day.

Stretch marks?: i honestly don't even look or notice

 Sleep?: i am getting used to having to wake up to pee or roll over- and yes i need assistance or full concentration just to roll over now so it does in fact wake me up!

Food cravings? ice cream, but i think that was more because of the sweltering heat outside and less a craving. I am finally eating again so it's been exciting to eat lots of food!

Movement?: LOTS and lots of movement. at the doctor's office the doc was trying to get a heartbeat and she put the machine up to my stomach for a minute and found about 3 beats before Cecelia literally kicked the machine until it slid off my stomach. after that the doctor couldn't find a heart beat because she was moving too much too fast! Her kicks and VERY strong now and my whole belly moves and is visible to people around me. It kinda weirds some people out!

 Gender?: GIRL!

Belly button?: very stretched out, but still an innie!

What are you looking forward to this week? we finish out birthing class this week. it was actually really informative, but i will be glad when it's done! the whole class has scared me and made me more and more nervous for the whole actual giving birth process. Ignorance was kinda bliss, but at least now i know what to expect and what options there are! Then it's time for BABY SHOWERS! i am really excited for these!


Sidenote- being VERY pregnant in the is not something i recommend. i am naturally a very warm blooded person and kinda hate heat to begin with, but this summer is pure torture. Poor Kel has been cold so many times and i am just sweating! I haven't even been able to make it to the pool very much this summer because i have been working crazy hours, so there is literally no escaping this horrible heat. I dread going outside even if it's just to get into my car! I can't wait until autumn, in fact i am ok with just skipping the rest of summer and having a SUPER long Autumn.